SUMMARY
Welcome
to the world of Frontier Martial Arts Wrestling!
Your hosts are John Watanabe and Eric
Geller. For
the next 100 minutes, you will enter the exciting world of Japanese wrestling. You will see fighters from Japan and America compete for money and respect. You will see some of the
strongest women ever to grace the world of wrestling! You even get to
learn some wrestling techniques.
So sit back and enjoy FMW.
DVD VISION TEST
VIDEO: The transfer is great.
No pixels, digital rainbows or color bleeds.
AUDIO: The 2.0 audio is fine, with no hiss or audible noise.
Everything is mostly center speaker based.
EDITS: Well, there are cuts, but nothing that detracts from the over all
matches.
EXTRAS: You have a text history of the FMW, a gallery, some wrestling moves, a bonus match, and a
retrospect on wrestler Hayabusa.
WIDESCREEN REVIEW
STORY:
Well, as this isn't fiction, there is no story. If you have watched
other wrestling videos, you have seen this one.
ACTING: Well, again, this isn't fiction. We have John Watanabe
and Eric Geller, two of the worst announcers I have ever herd. Their
scripted banter is stupid and obnoxious.
FAN SERVICE:
Well, you have this lovely lady! Really, this is not GLOW, so no hot
wrestling babes on this volume.
CONCLUSION
Okay, for a first release, I am
surprised that TOKYOPOP did not go out of business. How it became so
successful is beyond me.
Never have I seen so much fake wrestling
packed into 100 minutes. Sure, it starts off cool, but after the
first match, they go down hill. With all of the matches the wrestlers
are slow, they constantly miss their marks, and the so called "To the
Death" matches never seem to result in death, and rarely in blood. If
this is uncensored, I would hate to see censored.
These
are some of the ugliest wrestlers in the history of the sport. I
mean, look at the melon on Horrace
"CPA" Boulder. I can hear Mike Meyers yelling "Geet
Doun Heed" when ever I see him. And what is up with the horror
film psycho rip offs? Crypt Keeper, Sub-Leather, Jason the Terrible.
Are you kidding? Worst of all, why do we have three "Dump"
Matsumodo knock offs? I'm telling ya folks, Japanese wrestling has
really gone down hill.
The hardest thing
was having to listen to John
Watanabe and Eric Geller. These two morons are the worst
commentators in the history of sports. Their "homophobic"
jibes grate on my nerves. Their observations are totally clique.
"Ohh, that's gotta hurt!" Give me a break! Fortunately,
you can skip their segments, as well as change the audio during the
matches. That means you can watch most of the video with out seeing
these two asses!
While
I was not impressed, my eldest daughter was. Channeling my dearly departed
Mother in law, (who was an avid wrestling fan) my daughter spent most of
the time cheering on her favorites. Before some of you get up in
arms about letting my daughter watch FMW, I skipped over matches 5 and 7,
the most violent of the 9 total matches.
The
only positive part about this whole thing is the Snake Sisters. In the
closing credits, we get to see a little more of them, and they look like
they are going to be some sexy fun. However, a little T&A does
not make up for weak matches.
FMW
will only appeal to hard core wrestling fans, who can't get enough. For
the rest of you, spend your money on something better.
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